End of confinement....official one month old

Today is the day where i will need to take care of little one....by myself....with kun, with my mil....yes today marks the end of my confinement...my confinement nanny is leaving this afternoon.

How fast. One month ago Kyan was fresh out of my womb, crying at the top of his lungs when he was out. As quoted by Dr Heng, "small baby with a big voice..." Today, he is officially one month old....and this one month period since birth marks a few changes for him, knowing how to look and stare at us like as if he knows what we talking to him, knowing this is mummy...and this is daddy....knowing how to bully us! (by wailing out loud knowing someone will go to him eventually), crying to seek attention and wanting us to carry him....and not forgetting the few pounds he has put on since birth (as mummy can feel little one's getting heavier each time she carries him when breastfeeding).

Breastfeeding has also been a tough issue. Though i am fortunate enough not to worry about the issue of milk supply, it has been something which i have to motivate myself to do...A simple example will be having to wake up in the middle of the night to pump milk...i am someone who is too lazy to do that! But this time i am forced to....if not my breasts are so engorged and painful....engorgement or pump milk? I choose.

I am contemplating whether to latch little one in the middle of the night or pump milk. Though latching on is easier, its usually more energy consuming perhaps, having to stay awake for one full hour breastfeeding kyan while he may end up falling asleep in between, and the best part is, he may not be fully satisfied and will cry for milk shortly after (in such case i will end up waking so many times)....in comparison to pumping out milk...at least i know i can sleep once my duty is done...but i still have to sterilize bottles, warm up expressed breast milk (EBM), feed kyan....in the end, the time taken for both may be the same....and comparing both alternatives, latching on is definitely better than EBM. The milk is fresher, uncontaminated, baby is more attached to me and i get to bond with baby more. It may be a case where i still have to pump after latch on too, just to empty my breasts. As night time usually yields more milk than in the day and so breasts get easily engorged too. Now it is possible to pump up till 280ml in the night for one pump session...wonder whether i will reach 300ml?

Kyan loves to be cuddled and pat pat. And its tiring me out...or rather all of us...just like now when i'm carrying him in my arms.